A teacher of mine shared to us that his grandfather told him
"Its not good to be good."
I know. I've been trying to abide by the rules of being too good. I did good things to help others. It's not everyday I announce my good deed. I keep some to myself. It's the thought of helping. People will not often appreciate what I do. Nor will they appreciate who I am.
It hurts that I try my best to make people happy and I can't please the majority. Everynight I ask if there's a point to everything I do. Is there any good in being a guardian angel?Is there a point to what I do?
I often relate myself to the good guys. I feel for them when they get hurt. Inside, I say I'm like Guardian Angel Setsuna, I have a silver sword with me. But then, I have no Carin.
Hhhhh... This is a tough life.
How come Diki's fine? That's because she loves the bad guys.
How come Jade get's what she wants? That's because she's spoiled and a totale B!-*-
How come others are fine as they are? Because they put themselves on top of the list.
While me--- at the bottom of the my priority list.
I hate this. I'm turning into an emotional eater. Also, hungrier and hungrier to be the best that I can be. I guess, it's the only way I can please a lot of people including myself. But then, it still isn't enough.
Nothing seems to be.
It's no good to be too good. It's detrimental.